“Darkness was on the face of earth…God said “let there be light…God saw the light was good and divided the light from darkness”

Posted October 28, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

How can we bring the light of day one into the world?

The Breaking Matzo community is devastated by the recent anti-Semitic attack at the home of Rabbi Chaim Rottenberg in Monsey, a suburb north of New York City, during a Hanukkah celebration – the latest in a string of anti-Semitic incidents in recent weeks that including beatings of Jewish people in the streets of New York City and a massacre at a Kosher grocery store in Jersey City, N.J., in addition to the unimaginable loss of lives at The Tree of Life Synagogue in Pittsburgh.

We pray for those who lost their lives, and those families and friends who lost a loved one or are suffering injuries. May we all seek to find blessings in their beautiful memories. May the communities in New Jersey, New York and Pittsburgh find strength and hope to deal and heal with these unspeakable tragedies. Such anti-Semitic acts of violence are morally repugnant.

I decided to read the torah…

from…

The very first page….

Genesis 1.

In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. Now the earth was unformed and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep; and the spirit of God hovered over the face of the waters. And God said: ‘Let there be light.’ And there was light. And God saw the light, that it was good; and God divided the light from the darkness.
While we cannot fully protect ourselves from the darkness that occurs on our planet, each of us can, and must, choose daily to illuminate the earth with light of day 1 which is good.

During this Hanukkah Celebration and rededication, the light of the Menorah takes on even more significance and meaning.

We must vigorously divide the light from the darkness.

May we be inspired to cast radiant light in the midst of the unspeakable darkness.

History of Jews in Turkey

Posted October 24, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

Did you know that the first Hebrew printing press was invented in Instanbul in 1493?

Turkey has been a place of refuge for scores of persecuted Jews for centuries. Jewish settlements in the Turkey region date back to 4th century BCE and include the ancient cities Ephesus, Sardis, Pergamon and Smyrna (now known as Izmir). While Izmir was known for its large Jewish community, Sardis was known for its ancient synagogue built in 220 BCE. Its ruins still stand today. Other synagogues in Turkey include the Ahrida Synagogue founded in 1460, Zulfaris Synagogue (1671) and the Beit Yaacov synagogue (1878). With such rich history, it is easy to see the strong influence of the Jewish community in the early years of the Ottoman Empire and throughout the history of Turkey.

Turkey’s reputation as a safe haven for Jewish refugees began in 1492 when Jews were being persecuted in Spain. At the time, the King and Queen of Spain, Ferdinand and Isabella, ordered Jews to convert to Christianity or leave the country. When Sultan Bayezid II heard this, he welcomed the Sephardim, the term given Jews leaving Spain as a result of 1492 expulsion, into the Ottoman Empire. These Romaniote Jews were predominantly Greek Jews who had been living in the Eastern Mediterranean more than 2,000 years. The influx of Sephardim Jews in Turkey overwhelmed the existing Romaniote Jewish community. Eventually, the Romaniote culture was completely consumed by the Sephardim.

Under the Byzantine rule of Turkey’s early years beginning in AD 395, Jewish communities were oppressed and segregated. Jews could not live amongst Christians, were not allowed in civil service or the military, and could not marry non-Jews. Conversion to Judaism was also illegal.

Things changed during Ottoman Empire, established in 1299, under the rule of Sultan Orhan (1323-1362) who allowed Jewish people to build their first synagogue. The synagogue was named Etz ha-Hayyim, or “Tree of Life” which remained in service until approximately 50 years ago.

Mehmed II, also known as Mehmed the Conqueror, took over Constantinople in 1453 and found an oppressed Jewish community. Mehmed worked to give the Jewish people more opportunities and freedom. He appointed Hekim Yakuo Pasa, a Jew, as his minister of finance and physician Moses Hamon as Chief Physician to the Sultan. Mehmed also designated a Jewish grand rabbi and put plans in place to repopulate Constantinople through the establishment of many communities. Around this time, the Ottoman Empire began encouraging the immigration of Jews to their land. Jews received three invitations to immigrate to the land acquired by the Ottomans. Two invitations were made by Muslim sultans Muhammad II in mid-15th century and later Bayezid II in 1492. In a 1454 invitation from Rabbi Yitzhak Sarfati , he wrote: “Here every man dwells at peace under his own vine and fig tree”. The Rabbi sent the invitation in hopes of helping Jews throughout Europe could escape persecution by coming to Turkey. Thus, the Ottoman Empire became a safe place for European Jews trying to escape religious persecution.

By 1477, 11% of the households in Istanbul were Jewish. With a growing Jewish population as a result of increasing immigration, the Ottoman Empire enjoyed an extended period of prosperity and influence. One significant development was the invention of the printing press in 1493. David and Samuel ibn Nahmias created the first Hebrew printing press in Istanbul and went on to print the first book ever printed in the Ottoman Empire in December of 1493, Arbaah Turim (Four Orders of the Code of Law).

There were 80,000 Jews living in Turkey when Israel was established in 1948. This is thought to be the pinnacle of the Jewish population in Turkey. The freedom that Jewish communities enjoyed during this time led to the creation of exceptional literature and religious texts, advancing their spirituality.

In 1856, the proclamation of Hatti Humayun made all Muslim and non-Muslim Ottoman citizens equal under the law. As a result, leadership shifted its emphasis from the religious to the secular. The Ottoman Empire collapsed during WWI and the Turkish Republic rose with Mustafa Kemal Ataturk elected president. Under this new government, a secular constitution was created and the Caliphate was dissolved. When Turkey was recognized by the Treaty of Lausanne in 1923, it presented minority rights to the three principal non-Muslim religious minorities, Judaism being one, allowing them to continue their religious education and social institutions.

Today, the Jewish population in Turkey is approximately 17,200 out of a total population of 70 million. Approximately 330,000 – 450,000 Turkish Jews live around the world with 280,000 of those living in Israel. The Turkish Jews hold strongly to their cultural roots and pay homage to their history through such traditions as making bourekas and stuffed grape leaves. Although bourekas have Balkan roots and stuffed grape leaves were brought by the Romaniote Jews to Turkey, they still serve as important cultural ties to Turkey. Be sure to see our recipes for Potato Leek Bourekas and Spinach & Feta Bourekas.

Fun Fact:
Did you know that a Jewish diplomat, Salamon ben Nathan Eskenazi, was the first to construct diplomatic ties between the Ottoman Empire and the British Empire?

Peak Population of Jews in Turkey: 81,000 in 1923

Population of Jews in Turkey Today: 17,200

Population of Turkish Jews in Israel: 280,000

Ordinary to Extraordinary Lives: Joachim Ronneberg

Posted October 23, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

Under the cover of night, a five-man special operations team, parachuted into the snow laden region of Telemark in Norway. Their goal; to sabotage the Vemork plant, the Nazi’s only source of “heavy water,” a key ingredient in the manufacture of weapons-grade plutonium. 23-year-old Joachim Ronneberg and his team knew only that the Nazis were working on a “super weapon” and that the destruction of the plant was critical in thwarting those efforts.

The parachuters missed their mark and were forced to camp and wait out a snowstorm. On the night of February 27, 1943, the team made it to Vemork after a perilous journey negotiating frozen rivers and dangerous gorges in order to bypass a heavily-guarded bridge. Armed with metal cutters, Ronneberg gained access to the plant’s ventilation system, crawling through in order to find the series of pipes that were the intended target. Once there, he fitted the pipes with a series of bombs. He made a last-minute decision to trim the fuses so the bombs went off in 30 seconds instead of the originally planned 2 minutes. He wanted to be sure the bombs ignited successfully. They did. And miraculously the team escaped unscathed.

The team skiied more than 200 miles to reach Sweden before returning to Britain as war heroes. Joachim Ronneberg, the last surviving member of the 5-man team, passed away October 22, 2018 at the age of 99. The heroic tale of his team was told in the “The Heroes of Telemark,” a 1965 film starring Kirk Douglas.

Ronneberg rarely spoke of his role as a resistance fighter and hero. In his later years, he realized the value of sharing his experiences. “A few years ago,” he said, “I realized that I am part of history. Having been more or less silent for years, now I realize it is important and quite natural for people to ask about the past so they can plan for the future. People must realize that peace and freedom have to be fought for every day.”

Hanukkah Playlist

Posted October 23, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

Happy Hanukkah! We love to have music and videos play during our Hanukkah celebrations!

This playlist includes something for everyone! Have a wonderful eight nights!

Hanukkah Playlist (click here to Play All on YouTube)

Listen on Spotify

Click each title below to link to the individual YouTube videos:

“Oh Hanukkah”The Maccabeats

“The Hanukkah Song” Adam Sandler

“My Little Candle (Ner Li)” Hanukkah Players

“Latke Recipe” The Maccabeats

“Light One Candle” Hanukkah Players

“Candle Dance” Hershel and the Hanukkah Goblins

“Burn” The Maccabeats

“Hanukkah – Hava Nagila” Wet Fingers Club Mix ZJM

“Chanukah – Shake It Off” Six13

“Hanukkah (Favorite Time of Year)” Too $hort

“Honeyky Hanukah (Hanukkah)” The Klezmatics

“Happy Joyous Hanukkah” The Indigo Girls

“Hanukkah Blessings” Barenaked Ladies

“Feast of Lights” They Might Be Giants

“Hanukkah in Santa Monica” The Royal George Theatre Cast

“Hanukkah on Japonica” Panorama Jazz Band

Shoulda, Coulda, Woulda

Posted September 26, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

Have you lived life with regret? Have you experienced the feeling of “coulda, woulda,
shoulda”? Have your feelings of regret caused you to miss the blessings of the present
moment?

In the past, I often found myself consumed with regret and disappointment, focusing on what should, could or would have been. In business, I would think about a profitable opportunity I didn’t pursue. With my family, I would regret losing my temper or missing a family function due to business travel. Socially, I would think about who didn’t come to our party. Personally, I often wished I made healthier choices: late night pizza tasted good, but it certainly was not a prudent long-term healthy choice. Thinking about all of these issues, I always woke up with pangs of regret in the morning, looking ahead or reflecting on the past. I simply was not living in the present.

I truly began living in the moment during a 40-day long, doctor prescribed bed rest due to significant injury (For more on this please view my TED talk and read my blog). I was forced to slow down, even totally stop. I laid on my back for 23 hours a day for 40 days. I didn’t do any work. I didn’t watch any tv or movies. I simply read, wrote, and meditated. This experience totally changed my perspective. I began to really experience simple pleasures, enjoying one spoonful of dessert instead of eating the entire piece – both literally and figuratively (See “How One Small Bite is More Than Enough to Fill Your Stomach and Feed Your Soul”). It was my “reset” moment.

Regret is a truly distracting feeling that prevents us from experiencing what’s right in front of us, in the present moment and experiencing dayenu. Dayenu is the simple act of acknowledging and expressing gratitude in the moment. Being grateful to God for manna from heaven while the Israelites wandered in the wilderness. A simple dinner with my daughters. Appreciating the ability to stand on my own and take a shower without assistance after six months in a cast. Watching the clouds move and listening to the rustling of the leaves in the wind has become a favorite summer pastime. I learned to notice and appreciate the simple moments of life.

I looked to the Torah to explore the concept of regret. In Genesis 6:6, God expressed regret for making mankind. And the Lord regretted that He had made man upon the earth, and He became grieved in His heart. The Bible rarely speaks of God experiencing “regret.” The Hebrew word used here is yin’nā’hem, from the root word nacham. The word is exclusively about emotions: a feeling of pain, sadness, or unhappiness. As a result, God did a total reset of earth with a devastating flood. Noah followed God’s wishes to rebuild the world’s life with the ark holding the seeds of the world’s species. After the flood, God promised never to flood the world again. In Genesis 9:13, God made his covenant with Noah. My rainbow I have placed in the cloud, and it shall be for a sign of a covenant between Myself and the earth. The rainbow is the sign that God will never again destroy the earth.

What “flood” would signify your reset and stop you from living with regret? What proverbial rainbow would remind you to live in the moment and express dayenu?

In an effort to memorialize the end of living life with the “shoulda, coulda, woulda” attitude, I have created a line of t-shirts to inspire people to truly live in the moment. The t-shirts celebrate many Jewish ritual moments. And, in Breaking Matzo’s inclusionary spirit, I have incorporated other faiths and spiritual practices.

I hope you can stop living your life with “shoulda, coulda, woulda”, and begin anew with “shoulda, coulda, dayenu!”

History of Jews in Lebanon

Posted September 25, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

Did you know Lebanon was considered the “Switzerland” of the Middle East?

Jews have been in the area known today as Lebanon since pre-Biblical times. In 132 BCE, the Bar Kokhba Revolt, or the Third Jewish-Roman War as it was also known, took place. Following the war, several Jewish communities were established in Lebanon, including Tripoli, Sidon, and Tyre. They were known as the Mizrahi Jews. Mizrahi Jews comprise Jewish populations not only in Lebanon, but in Iraq, Syria, Yemen, Iran, Afghanistan, Uzbekistan and Egypt among others.

In 1710, there was a significant immigration of Jews to the Chouf mountains of Lebanon. The Chouf village of Deir al-Qamar was one of the first places in Lebanon with a large Lebanese Jewish population. The first recorded Chief Rabbi in Lebanon was Moise Yedid-Levy who served from 1799 – 1829. Immigration of Jews to Lebanon peaked from the early 19th century to the second half of the 20th century, beginning with immigrants from Akko in 1809; Greece in 1821; Egypt and other parts of North Africa in 1837; and Syria, Iraq and Iran between 1900-1955. Ashkenazi Jews immigrated from Europe in 1833.

In the first half of the 20th century, people described life as a Jewish person in Lebanon as well-integrated with congenial relationships with neighbors and community members, regardless of religion. Many traditions were shared between Lebanese Jews and people of other religions. Two schools taught Hebrew and other subjects related to Judaism. For centuries Lebanon had a balance of Muslim and Christian populations which allowed for a balanced government structure. The arrival of Palestinian refugees in 1948 started the shift towards a Muslim majority. Simultaneously, Anti-Zionist demonstrations began along with an emerging hostility toward the Jews and the 1948 Arab-Israeli war broke out.

In 1967, sparked by economic insecurity and increasing violence, the first of two major migrations of Jewish people from Lebanon began. The second wave was the result of fear by Jews of religious and political persecution, heightened by the kidnapping of several key figures in the Jewish community between 1971 – 1985. They were kidnapped for ransom while some were murdered. One victim was the president of the Jewish community at the time, Isaac Sasson. With 1,800 Jews remaining in Lebanon, most finally had emigrated in 1976 when Jewish communities were damaged during the civil war with the majority leaving for the U.S., France or Canada.

As of 2017, fewer than 100 Jews were reported living in Lebanon and they cannot practice Judaism openly. The leader of Lebanon’s Jewish community council, Isaac Arazi, announced plans to rebuild the Maghen Abraham Synagogue located in Beirut’s Wadi Abu Jamil in 2008. This synagogue was destroyed during the Lebanese Civil War (1975-1990). The renovation began in 2009 after approval by Hezbollah, the Lebanese government and other authorities. The reconstruction was funded by private donors and Solidere donations, a construction company owned by the family of assassinated Prime Minister, Rafik Hariri. Another synagogue still standing and serving as a religious landmark is the Ohel Yaacob Synagogue, or “Tent of Jacob”, in Saida. It is now a private residence. The famous New Temple was one of the last synagogues built in Lebanon. The Bhamdoun Synagoue also known as the “New Temple” because it was the last temple built in Lebanon, was the largest synagogue ever built in Lebanon. Bhamdoun was once a popular summer resort for many Jews. Once the civil war began and the Syrian army arrived, the Jews abandoned Bhamdoun and the temple.

Lebanese Jews living in diaspora are strongly connected to their roots. This is especially true for the first generation Lebanese Jews. Food enters this long line of tradition and generations have embraced typical Lebanese cuisine modifying recipes to maintain Jewish dietary guidelines. For example, Kibbeh (a mixture of bulgur wheat, spices, onion and meat) is traditionally served with yogurt. Jews simply serve it without. A popular dairy dessert is Khafeh, a syrup-soaked cheese pastry, which Lebanese Jews also serve for breakfast. Be sure to see Andy’s blog, Lebanese Food: A Family Tradition & Personal Passion.

Here are Breaking Matzo’s Lebanese-inspired recipes!

Today’s remaining Lebanese Jewish populations reside in the U.S., Mexico, Brazil, Italy, France and Canada. This disparate community stays well connected through social media. While it is difficult to determine the exact number of Lebanese Jews worldwide, there are approximately 7,000 currently in Israel.

Fun Fact:
Did you know that the League of Nations, following the collapse of the Ottoman Empire and WWI, mandated control of the 5 provinces today known as Lebanon to the control of France? During this time Lebanon was known as “Switzerland” of the Middle East.

Peak Population of Jews in Lebanon: 20,000 in 1948

Population of Jews in Lebanon: <100 in 2017

Population of Lebanese Jews in Israel: 7,000

Harmony of Opposition

Posted September 12, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

Have you ever discovered a friendship in a former foe? When was the last time you embraced a totally different perspective from your own and found a surprising sense of harmony and understanding?

Today, there is a lot of talk of public discord and the inability to find common ground and bridge the political divide. Some talk about the need for tolerance of political differences. I believe there is another way to think about it. In addition to tolerance, I believe we need a celebration of political and ideological differences by embracing our differences, as opposed to only seeking out similarities, we can actually bring more harmony into our lives.

This blog explores the concept of the harmony of opposition.

Many people seek out others with the same perspectives. It validates ones ideas and feels more comfortable. I spent time contemplating the idea of “sameness” and studying different philosophies, and have concluded that nothing can actually be the same. The Greek philosopher Heraclitus famously said “No man enters the river twice, for it is not the same man, and it is not the same river.” There are always differences. Even identical twins have a slightly different genetic make-up. Therefore, if no two ideas, people, moments or things can be the same, we need to learn to accept differences.

The most easily understood and extreme differences are opposites. Does this mean that opposites necessarily create conflict or discord?

I looked to the human hand for a simple answer. We sometimes take the usefulness of the human hand for granted. The hand is so effective due to the evolution of the “opposing thumb”. The thumb, unlike other fingers, is opposable. It is unique in that it can be turned on itself and reverse directions with the other four fingers. This allows the hand to grasp and hold objects in a way that would be impossible if all five fingers moved in the same manner. The ability to grasp and hold based on the opposable thumb is what allowed humans to develop accurate fine motor skills. This led to the development of tools, significantly advancing and extending human physical capabilities. Its evolution is typically associated with Homo Habilis species, the forerunner of Homo Sapiens. This evolution is considered to have occurred more than 2.3 million years ago. Homo Habilis is thought to have been the forerunner to Homo Erectus later evolving to the modern human species.

I continued to explore Heraclitus and his thoughts on finding harmony in opposition.

He said the following:

“What is cold becomes hot, what is hot becomes cold, what is moist becomes dry, what is dry becomes moist”.

“The same thing are the living and the dead, the awake and the sleeping, the young and the old: these indeed changing are those and those again changing are these”.

“Immortal mortals, mortal immortals, living their death and dying their life”.

“One and the same is the path that goes upward and the path that goes downward”.

“The same are in fact the beginning and the end in the circumference of the circle”.

“Opposites are concordant, and from the discordant comes beautiful harmony, and everything happens according to contention”.

Heraclitus explored the harmony of opposition in the context of a free flowing river. Despite the differences of the source of river water at the top of the mountain and at the end of the river pouring into the ocean, the entire river is connected by the same free flowing water. Despite the differences, upstream vs. downstream, mountain water vs. ocean water, they are connected and exist as part of the same river.

The harmony of opposites allow the river to freely flow and sustain vibrant life, such as fish and vegetation. By contrast, water that doesn’t have movement or integration of opposite sources could be a pond or a lake. Without a fresh water source, the water can become still and stagnant. Life cannot flourish or be sustained in stagnant water. In other words, though the waters are always changing, the rivers stay the same. Indeed, it must be precisely because the waters are always changing that there are rivers at all, rather than lakes or ponds. The message is that rivers can stay the same over time even though, or indeed because, the waters change. The point, then, is not that everything is changing, but that the fact that some things change makes possible the continued existence of other things.

I looked to Greek Mythology for another perspective. Harmonia is the Greek god of harmony. Harmonia is the daughter of Ares (the Greek god of war) and Aphrodite (the Greek god of Love). Harmony is truly the harmonization of the connection of the opposites of love and war.

I looked to the Bible to explore the concept of harmony of opposition in Ecclesiastes 3.

Ecclesiastes 3 starts off with:

“A season is set for everything, a time for every experience under heavens.” What is interesting when you read further is that every phrase lists complete opposite actions and circumstances. “A time for silence and a time for speaking… A time for loving and a time for hating…A time for war and a time for peace”. I believe that the Bible teaches us that we can only truly find harmony if we fully experience the breadth and depth of life by experiencing all of life and not just the dimensions of life that we might choose.

In conclusion, I would to explore the uniqueness of the human hand shake.

A handshake is entirely intuitive. Who initiates and how high and hard do you shake? When do you stop shaking? It is truly an emotional and meaningful connection between two people. However, the most important part of the hand shake involves the thumb. Imagine a handshake if you didn’t or couldn’t use your thumb. It would be considered a “fish hand” that would create an unsettling feeling. It is truly using the oppositional force of your thumb that creates shared human connection and harmony. May we all strive in the coming year to seek out oppositional ideas to create harmony and pause to consider how a simple handshake can create connections in our communities and beyond.

Appendix:

Ecclesiastes 3

A season is set for everything, a time for every experience under heavens:
A time for being born and a time for dying,
A time for planting and a time for uprooting the planted;
A time for slaying and a time for healing,
A time for tearing down and a time for building up;
A time for weeping and a time for laughing,
A time for wailing and a time for dancing;
A time for throwing stones and a time for gathering stones,
A time for embracing and a time for shunning embraces;
A time for seeking and a time for losing,
A time for keeping and a time for discarding;
A time for ripping and a time for sewing,
A time for silence and a time for speaking;
A time for loving and a time for hating;
A time for war and a time for peace.

Heraclitus (fl. c. 500 B.C.E.)

A Greek philosopher of the late 6th century BCE, Heraclitus criticizes his predecessors and contemporaries for their failure to see the unity in experience. He claims to announce an everlasting Word (Logos) according to which all things are one, in some sense. Opposites are necessary for life, but they are unified in a system of balanced exchanges. Heraclitus propounded a distinctive theory which he expressed in oracular language. He is best known for his doctrines that things are constantly changing (universal flux), and that opposites coincide (unity of opposites).

Sources:

Wikipedia
Jewish Publication Society (JPS)
The Harmony of Opposites, Ancestors Voice

Succot Menu Ideas

Posted August 31, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

Celebrate Succot, the Festival of Booths commemorating the harvest, with one or more of our recipes!

Here are two suggested Succot menu options – one meat and one dairy.

Succot Menu 1 (Meat)

Beverage:
Indian-Jewish Sangria

Apple Cider Hot Toddy

Appetizers:
Lamb Kebabs

Stuffed Baby Artichokes

7-Spice Kibbeh

Sephardic Lamb Meatballs with Kosher Cashew Dipping Sauce

Entrees:
Bubbie’s Stuffed Cabbage

Chraime

Classic Meatballs

Quinoa & Vegetable-Stuffed Acorn Squash

Sides:
Israeli Salad

Massaged Kale Salad with Berkshire Cherry Tomatoes & White Beans (Vegan & Gluten-free)

Desserts:
Apple Honey Cake

Poached Pears (Vegan & Gluten-free)

Succot Menu 2 (Dairy)

Beverage:
Indian-Jewish Sangria

Apple Cider Hot Toddy

Appetizers:
Parsnip & Apple Soup

Baba Ganoush with Crudite

Potato Leek Bourekas

Spinach & Feta Bourekas

Entrees:
Butternut Squash Lasagna

Samkeh Harra (Fish with Spicy Sauce)

Sides:
Fattoush Salad

Spinach Salad with Lakeview Orchard Apples, Pears & Fennel (Vegan & Gluten-free)

Spinach Salad with Apples, Pears & Fennel

Desserts:
Apple Rose Pastries

Marzipan Stuffed Dates (Vegetarian & Gluten-free)

The Beauty of Being Broken

Posted August 31, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

Have you ever had a very sentimental object break? How did you handle the loss? What did you learn?

My most valued and sentimental possession was broken recently. I have had this object for 46 years and treasured it carefully. This Succot, it broke…but my spirit didn’t. Here is what I learned, and how I found a beautiful blessing in this tremendous disappointment.

I believe I have the world’s oldest etrog. Really! My mom saved it for me when I was 4 years old. It has been carefully wrapped and saved in a special box from Jerusalem given to me by my uncle, a renowned and beloved Rabbi. Below are photos of my family’s Succot celebration when I was 4 and when my uncle from Israel gave us the etrog box from Jerusalem.

l to r: Laurence and Andy Goldfarb, Allentown, PA, 1972

pictured clockwise from upper right: Dr. Ada Goldfarb – Andy’s aunt, Rabbi Daniel Goldfarb – Andy’s uncle, a family friend and Myra Outwater, Andy’s mother, 1973

I don’t remember receiving the box – It was kind of always there, sitting on the shelf. In 2006, I built my first succah, which was the first to be approved in the Back Bay of Boston. I was so excited for my daughters Caroline and Lucy (then 10 and 7) to have their very own succah and share the joy and excitement I had experienced when I was a young boy. I vividly remember opening the box and discovering the etrog, wrapped in gauze, so fragile and delicate.

The stem of an etrog is called a pitam and it needs to be intact for the etrog to be kosher. During Succot, the etrog and lulav are held together and shaken vigorously in six directions to signify the divine presence all around us and within our hearts.

See Andy do the succah dance!

Because of the etrog’s delicate nature, I was particularly careful with the pitam of my precious etrog. Each day of Succot, I would bring my etrog box into the succah and carefully show it, along with a photo of our family, to each guest. I would explain the significance of my etrog and how it was the oldest one in the world. Each time I displayed it, I became increasingly attached to it. It grew into my heart, as its symbolic shape suggests. (See The Meaning of the Lulav and Etrog). I never let anyone touch the precious etrog — for fear of breaking the pitam. In hindsight, I was so focused on the potential loss, I wasn’t able to fully embrace the blessing of the moment.

This year’s Succot celebration began no differently from previous ones. While I have always hosted family, friends, and strangers, this was my first Succot without my daughters. My eldest, Caroline, graduated from college and moved away. My youngest, Lucy was a freshman at college. It was also my first Succot since turning 50 years old.

I welcomed a group of friends into my succah and led the group in the ritual Succot blessings (over the wine, lulav and etrog) and did the succah dance. As usual, I carefully showed my precious etrog, guarding the delicate and precariously attached stem. As we gathered for a group photo, one of my friends brushed against the lulav which, in turn, knocked over the etrog box containing my treasured, 46-year-old etrog.

I paused, fearing the worst. I slowly opened the box. My greatest fear was realized: I found the small pitam in the bottom of the box. My etrog had broken. It was no longer kosher. I was overcome with many feelings. I was upset, angry and disappointed. I was also afraid. What did it mean to have my favorite possession broken and its religious significance lost?

I decided to meditate. My party, a festival of booths representing both abundance and vulnerability was still in full flow, but I was feeling numb and disconnected from the festivities.

Thankfully, my Rabbi had come to my Succot celebration. I asked him to join me for a private moment, away from the celebration, away from my broken pitam. We talked. I shared how upset I was. Surely, there must be a blessing to be found. I paused, breathed and reflected. I simply couldn’t let the broken stem ruin my celebration or hinder my happiness.

Later, I decided to explore Jewish traditions for deeper meaning. The ancient Jewish wedding ritual of breaking a glass following the ceremony came to mind. In great moments of joy, we are supposed to pause and recognize that suffering also exists. The breaking of the glass causes this pause and also signifies that the strength of the marriage bond can handle adversity. This custom dates back to the Talmud.

Mar bar Rabina made a marriage feast for his son. He observed that the rabbis present were very gay. So he seized an expensive goblet worth 400 zuzim and broke it before them. Thus he made them sober. Berakhot 5:2

I also thought of Moses and the Ten Commandments. Moses smashed the Ten Commandments in a fit of rage over the Israelites building a golden calf at the base of Mount Sinai. The Ten Commandments were broken, but never forgotten.

And it came to pass, as soon as he came nigh unto the camp, that he saw the calf and the dancing; and Moses’ anger waxed hot, and he cast the tablets out of his hands, and broke them beneath the mount. Exodus 32:19

I then considered the Japanese concept of Wabi Sabi.

Wabi connotes rustic simplicity, freshness or quietness, and can be applied to both natural and manmade objects, or understated elegance. It can also refer to quirks and anomalies arising from the process of construction, which lend uniqueness and elegance to the object. Sabi is beauty or serenity that comes with age, when the life of the object and its impermanence are evidenced in its patina and wear, or in any visible repairs.

“Wabi-sabi nurtures all that is authentic by acknowledging three simple realities: nothing lasts, nothing is finished, and nothing is perfect.” Powell, Richard R. (2004). Wabi Sabi Simple. Adams Media.

I also recalled the saying: “A broken heart allows light in”. I have experienced personal loss and challenges over the years and discovered inner strength and faith during these periods of great adversity.

Finally, I remembered a story my Rabbi shared at a high holiday sermon:

A king had a precious diamond that fell and cracked. The king was upset and devastated over his loss. His spectacularly beautiful diamond had broken. A jeweler said he could repair it and the king offered the jeweler the chance to try. When the jeweler returned with the diamond, the king was disappointed when he examined the newly repaired diamond. “The crack is still there!” he proclaimed sadly. The jeweler said, “Please look more closely, there is now a rose carved into your diamond and the crack is now transformed into the rose’s stem… the cracked diamond is now a beautifully flowered rose.”

I believe the universe presented me with the broken pitam as way to learn acceptance. In my first fifty years of life, I have been fortunate to experience my Succah of Abundance, alongside great vulnerability in loss and mourning. In these sad and difficult times, I have experienced my Succah of the Wilderness – my true vulnerability. Abundance is much sweeter knowing the pain of loss. I can now experience Dayenu — true gratitude for my blessings. In addition, I have found that faith, both in the divine spirit and myself, has carried me during the difficult moments of vulnerability and loss.

In an interesting twist of events, I discovered there is now a variation of etrog that is pitamless. A kosher etrog without a stem! With these etrogs, there is no worry or concern about the pitam falling off and becoming posul (not kosher).

I am happy I had the chance to share my etrog, in all its vulnerability, with friends and family over the years. Had I kept it in its case and never showed it to anyone, it would be intact and in its original form. However, we would have all missed out on so many important discussions and lessons. Truly experiencing life sometimes requires the risk of loss.

In Japanese wabisabi thought, you actually fill the cracks of precious broken pottery with a gold filling. The concept is to highlight and celebrate the imperfections. And so, I plan on painting some gold dust on my broken stem.

I also developed a new attitude. I no longer view the etrog as “my etrog.” I realize my mom entrusted me to be its caretaker. I have treasured and protected it for myself over the years. I now fully embrace the responsibility and privilege to be the etrog’s caretaker for my family and community. In this role, the greatest blessing has been sharing it with friends and family. I fervently hope that one day my daughters will similiarly treasure and caretake the etrog and share its blessings broadly.

Next year, I look forward to sharing not only the beauty of the precious etrog but the lessons of its broken stem. In many ways, the broken stem truly exemplifies the fragility and vulnerability of the Succah of the Wilderness in which the Israelites lived during the 40 years in the wilderness. Only after understanding our inner vulnerability and experiencing our collective broken pitam, we can truly live in our succah of abundance in the Promised Land.

Additional Reading:
Kintsugi: The Centuries-Old Art of Repairing Broken Pottery with Gold

Lebanese Food: A Family Tradition & Personal Passion

Posted August 29, 2018 by Breaking Matzo

I love Lebanese food. Always have. Growing up, my mom and dad, two brothers and I always had Lebanese food on Sunday nights. We went to our local (and only) Lebanese restaurant nearly every Sunday for dinner. Many families went to Sunday Chinese dinner. We loved Lebanese! The restaurant was called The Beirut. We called it Jimmy’s after the name of the owner. It was at Jimmy’s that I fell in love with Hummus, Baba Ganoush, Shish Taouk, and my absolute favorite, Kibbeh Nayeh! (Kibbe Nayeh is raw ground lamb mixed with bulgur wheat and mint and other spices). Many years later, my brother and I would return to The Beirut (aka Jimmy’s) with our extended family and once again enjoy our favorite Lebanese dishes to continue our family tradition and share memories.

More recently as an adult, I learned the universality of Lebanese food. Hummus, a staple in Lebanese households, is one of the most common foods across the globe and really unites the world’s palate (I remember the first time I made Hummus from scratch). Virtually anywhere you go, Hummus is offered on the menu.

To celebrate Lebanese food, we are sharing some of our favorite recipes we hope you will create and share in your homes:

Also, I travel extensively, often looking forward to my favorite Lebanese Restaurants. Here are some of my recommendations:

NYC: Ilili
London: Ishbilia (best Kibbeh Nayeh in London!)
Dubai: Al Safadi
Abu Dhabi: Diwan L’Auberge at Emirates Palace
Tel Aviv / Jaffa: Abu Hassan on dolphin street (best Hummus in Israel!)
Kuwait City: Assaha