Saved by A Stranger at Coachella

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When was the last time you received help from a stranger? How were you saved by the stranger?

I recently attended Coachella and chaperoned my daughter and her friends. During one concert, I overhead a woman explaining to her friend that she had lost her phone and was so lucky to find it in the massive crowd. “My phone was saved by strangers at the ferris wheel,” I heard her say.

Holly was visiting Coachella from San Francisco with her friend Betsy who flew in from Australia. Holly had asked some girls to take a photo of her and Betsy in front of the iconic Coachella ferris wheel. Later in the afternoon, Holly reached into her purse for her phone and discovered it was missing. Holly didn’t panic. But she realized that she had lost her phone at Coachella amidst the 125,000 fans in attendance. She spent the next few hours alternating between enjoying the amazing music and occasionally thinking about what she lost on her phone and how she would replace her phone when she returned to San Francisco. “Three days of enforced meditation and solitude” she thought to herself.

Meanwhile, earlier in the afternoon the girls who took the photo of Holly and Betsy at the ferris wheel were surprised to find a phone on the ground. When they picked it up and opened it (there was no passcode — more on this later) they were shocked to see the photo of the girls that they had taken a photo of earlier.

While Holly was connecting with the music and people at Coachella without her phone, the girls attempted to connect with Holly’s friends/family by dialing recent numbers on Holly’s phone. As Holly later learned, the girls talked to many of her friends and had warm conversations about how they knew Holly. The girls’ plea was simple; “We found this phone at Coachella and are trying to find Holly’s friend so we can return it to her.” After many calls, they finally reached Betsy and made the connection! “Are you here at Coachella? Are you with Holly? Did we take your photo by the ferris wheel?” Betsy confirmed she was indeed with Holly. Holly was so relieved to hear the news and both ran to the ferris wheel to meet the girls. When Holly was reunited with her phone, she looked to the sky above the ferris wheel and said to herself “Trust the universe.”

I ended up talking with Holly after overhearing the story. One nuance really peaked my curiosity. “Holly, why did you not have a passcode on your phone?” Holly explained that she always has a passcode. However, that morning, she happened to remove her passcode to leave the phone unlocked for a friend at her house to access her phone. “I completely forgot to turn the passcode lock back on before I came to Coachella” Holly said with surprise.

I reflected and asked Holly. “If you had known you would lose your phone at Coachella today, would taking off the passcode have been a good or bad idea?” Obviously in a general sense, we are guarded in society and would always say to leave your phone locked. However, today, it was solely because Holly left her phone unlocked that the girls (who were complete strangers) were able to access her phone and connect with her friends to find Betsy and then reunite Holly and her phone.

As I reflected on this story of being saved by a stranger and becoming vulnerable by unlocking one’s passcode to allow access to inner secrets, I thought of Genesis 37 when Joseph was also saved by a stranger.

Joseph was the favorite son of Jacob/Israel. Joseph’s brother came to have tremendous envy and hatred of him. In Genesis 37, Jacob/Israel asks Joseph to go and look for his brothers. On the way, Joseph got lost in Shechem. There he happened to run into a stranger. This stranger asked Joseph, “What are you looking for?” (Joseph) answered, “I am looking for my brothers. Could you tell me where they are pastoring?” The (stranger) said “they have gone from here, for I heard them say “let us go to Dothan” so Joseph followed his brothers and found them at Dothan.”

Both Holly and Joseph were saved by a stranger. Interestingly, Joseph also unlocked his heart by sharing that he was “looking for my brothers”. In spite of the fact his brothers “hated him so that they could not speak a friendly word to him”, Joseph was still open and vulnerable to seeking them. Holly unlocked the passcode of her iPhone which enabled strangers to connect with her friends/family inside the phone and reunite her with her phone. Holly and Joseph both ultimately found what they were looking for. Their journeys were possible because they placed their trust in strangers and allowed themselves to be vulnerable by unlocking their inner passcode. Sometimes you can become stronger by allowing yourself to be more vulnerable.

One of my earliest memories of my Mom was when I was 5-6 years old and we were driving down Hamilton Boulevard (a very busy street in Allentown Pennsylvania) in the middle of January. It was freezing cold and very windy. Suddenly, my mom stopped the car in the middle of the traffic. She got out, ran across the street and continued down the block to catch a hat that was blowing in the wind. She then ran the hat back to a bald, elderly gentleman. My mom had seen his hat blow off. She got back in the car and we drove home. I will never forget this simple act of kindness for a stranger.

More Information on Coachella

What Do You Stand For?

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This is the first blog written by Andy’s daughter Caroline (age 21) for Breaking Matzo

On January 19th, Olympic gymnast Aly Raisman told Larry Nassar, former USA Gymnastics national team doctor, that “the tables have turned,” and she and her “army of survivors” were “not going anywhere.” She detailed her experiences with Nassar, her path to finding hope and strength in the wake of the abuse, and her hopes for improvement in USA Gymnastics. Raisman was speaking in court, testifying in the case that put Nassar in jail for sexually and physically abusing countless young gymnasts throughout his career. Raisman was one of many brave and strong women who spoke out about Nassar’s evil behavior, and in doing so, inspired the nation.

This is only one part of Raisman’s incredible journey – from ordinary to extraordinary. Raisman grew up in Needham, Massachusetts and began doing gymnastics at the young age of two. Like many other girls her age, she was in awe of the US’s “Magnificent Seven,” the group of young women who won gold medals in gymnastics at the 1996 Summer Olympics. After that, Raisman began to work harder than ever to master the sport, taking part in many national and international competitions before finally landing a spot on the 2012 team for the London Summer Olympics. In London, Raisman’s lifetime of work paid off as she became the first American woman to win a gold medal in the gymnastics event, floor. But that wasn’t the only thing that made this routine special. Raisman’s floor routine was set to the ““Hava Nagila,” a popular Jewish song traditionally sung at celebrations like weddings and Bar and Bat Mitzvahs. With this performance, Raisman not only became one of the most extraordinary American gymnasts of all time, but she did so while celebrating her Jewish heritage. The next year, in 2013, Raisman lit the inaugural flame of the Maccabiah Games, the Jewish Olympics. In 2016, Raisman helped the US team win another gold medal, and became the second most decorated American Olympic gymnast in history.

Since the Olympics, Raisman has been making an impact in other ways. She is a brand ambassador for UNICEF, speaks about body positivity and confidence through her part in American Eagle and Sports Illustrated campaigns, and has encouraged girls to pursue their athletic dreams through her work with Playtex Sport.

Aly Raisman is an important role model for children and adults, for young women and men, and for Jews and non-Jews alike. Through her gymnastics career, she has demonstrated the value of perseverance and shown young girls to never give up on their dreams. With her gold-medal-winning floor routine, Raisman chose to highlight Judaism and its importance to her life, bringing Jewish culture to the forefront of the international stage. And now, with her awe-inspiring testimony against Nassar, Aly Raisman has shown her extraordinary strength in overcoming her fears and facing her former abuser in order to seek justice for herself, the many others who survived Nassar’s abuse, and countless gymnasts to follow. Aly Raisman has taught us to never let our fears of being ordinary stop us from becoming extraordinary. Thank you, Aly.

How Do You Keep Your Seder Traditions Alive?

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This article was written by Andy’s mother, Myra Yellin Outwater (of blessed memory) and published in The Morning Call, April 21, 1997.

Passover’s Traditions Provide Present with a Link to the Past

Recently, we read that the last days of the Heaven’s Gate cult were spent eating fast food. However, McDonald’s doesn’t nourish the soul. Chicken soup and chopped liver do.

For years, my memories of the Jewish holiday meals have been filled with the comfort foods of tradition. And as I set the table once more for Passover and cook my chicken soup, I know that while the Passover Seder may be high in cholesterol, it’s also high on love.

To me, the lesson of Heaven’s Gate is that too many people think that they can establish their own sense of order with few connections to the past. But sadly, not many have found an “order” as satisfying or as nourishing as that of tradition. As I gather the Passover Haggadahs (prayer books), I think a lot about the fact that “seder” means order, and each year at Passover we conduct ourselves the same way, according to tradition.

Seders have helped keep the fabric of Jewish society together for thousands of years. At the Seder, we talk of service to others and service to God rather than self-service. In the center of the table in every Jewish home are the symbols of the Passover story, the flight of the Jews from Egyptian bondage. There is a lamb shank, an egg, the bitter herbs, the sweet mixture of charoseth, the salt water, a green vegetable, the goblet of wine for the prophet Elijah and three matzah. And each year, we open the Haggadah and tell the same Passover story, say the same prayers, sing the same songs and serve the same menu.

And, despite the zeal of food editors to promote nouvelle Passover cuisines, most families stick to the old standbys — chicken soup, matzah balls, chopped liver, roasted chicken, matzah, flourless sponge cakes and macaroons. Matzah balls and chicken soup are the glue that have held families together for generations.

Each year, we ask the same four questions. Tonight my youngest son will be the one to ask: “Why is this night different from all other nights?”

My first memories of Seder are of me standing up, petrified, reciting the same questions. In those days, my father had the answers. Tonight I do.

There is no equivocation at the Seder. Giving the answers is part of the order of things, and at the Seder, if you don’t answer the questions, you don’t eat. And, each year we read about four sons. The one who is wise, the one who is contrary, the one who is simple and the one who does not even know how to ask a question. And, each year we read that the worst sin is not knowing how to ask.

We live in a society that is afraid of answers, afraid to search for painful truths. But truth and honesty are like the Passover bitter herbs and charoseth, sometimes bitter, sometimes sweet. It is not easy to make a commitment to traditional values. But it is part of the order of things.

But while the Seder is a holiday feast, it is also the holiday that recalls that time in history when we got the gift of the Ten Commandments. How sad it is that to many today, these laws have become irrelevant. How sad that even judges must remove them from public courtrooms; and that children no longer honor their parents; and that people kill, murder, steal, covet, commit adultery; and that too often, God becomes a swear word rather than a prayer.

My father hated a lie. He would have felt uncomfortable in today’s society where there are so many varieties, so many while lies, half-lies, safe lies and evasions.

Passover is also a time for families, and when it falls during the week, as it does this year, it is a time off during a work week to celebrate love.

This year, while the order of the service and the order of the mean remain the same, the faces at my table will be different. My mother has disappeared into her own past, a resident of a local nursing home. And my aunt is now the one to tell the old stories and be our memory. More than 70 years ago at the moment in the Seder service when the door is symbolically opened to welcome the prophet Elijah, my grandmother found a stranger standing at the door. Undaunted, she offered him food, but all he wanted was directions. And through the years, the telling of his visit has become a special part of our holiday service.

My own special Passover memories are of my three sons competing with each other to each the most “maror” or bitter herbs. At Passover, we eat bitter herbs to remember the pain and tears of slavery and oppression, and charoseth, a combination of chopped apples, nuts and sweet wine, to recall the joys of freedom. When my sons were younger, they thought it was macho to be able to handle the horseradish. Today the two oldest are parents themselves and will soon sample their own blend of charoseth and maror, the joys and tears of parenthood.

Why is this night different from all other nights?

Because on this night we try to learn from the past and at the end of the Seder when we search for the Afikomen, the missing piece of matzah, in order to conclude the service, that search becomes just one more link with history and an orderly transference of tradition from one generation to another.

There is no headline. Please read the entire blog.

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There is a lot of discussion about biases and untruths in the media. Many people comment on the discord surrounding political discussions and discourse. We are inundated with headlines which sometimes stir up frenzy and anxiety. Regardless of political persuasion, many of us are disappointed with the media’s ability to communicate impartial and unsensational facts that can be trusted.

I have reflected on the psychological power of newspaper headlines and had a radical thought. Let’s ban all headlines for 40 days. Newspapers and their writers would retain editorial and journalistic freedom…the body of the article would remain the same…just NO headlines.

Why would this be so powerful?

Often, people read only the headlines and skip reading the entire article. A sound bite doesn’t examine the entire story. Without the benefit of learning about the complexity and multiple sides of an issue, we lack the ability to think and formulate our own opinions.

Given the nature of my Breaking Matzo blogs, I wanted to compare my experience of reading the newspaper with my study of the Bible. Here goes…

The average number of words in a newspaper article is 1235 and the average number of words in a headline is 7.4.  Therefore, the average person reads a headline in 3-4 seconds, that’s less than half a second per word.  Many people draw conclusions about an article’s topic based on a glance. The lack of reading for understanding may lead to conflict with one’s community and loved ones discussing issues that are polarizing or political.  Because many people react emotionally to an issue, wouldn’t it be better if we all took the time to read all the facts? If we did take the time, we could ponder all sides of an issue, form an educated opinion, then have the ability to engage in a more civil discourse.

How does reading the newspaper compare with reading the Bible?

I attend a monthly Bible study group.  On average we spend 90 minutes studying 30 words of one Bible section.  This is about 3 minutes per word.  Each topic involves very different personal perspectives.  In the Bible, there are no chapter titles, no headlines, and no chapter summaries.  We study subtlety and navigate nuance.  We discuss a broad range of ideas and look for connections and meaning throughout the Bible and within our personal narratives and experiences.  Our group is diverse and we share our different positions with mutual respect and honor for tradition.

I have found that each Bible study session makes me feel closer to my study mates and provides me with inspiration and varied viewpoints from my own, that make me more well- rounded in my thoughts and discussions with friends, family and colleagues.  In addition, I have found that I can study the same Bible passage multiple times, over time, and come away with different ways of looking at the text.

So how about it? What if we could read Newspapers more similarly to the Bible for a period of time?  For 40 days?

With no headlines, each of us could take the time to read an entire article, delve into details and develop complete understanding.

It has worked for the Bible.  Why not for the media?

Research:
We counted the words of every front page article and headline in The Boston Globe, New York Times, and Wall Street Journal every day from January 16 to Friday February 9. We counted 380,172 words in 308 articles over 19 days in these three publications to determine the average words per article and average words per headline from 1/16/18 to 2/9/18.

Average words per article 1,234

Average words per headline 7.4

 

What Is the Connection between Passover and Tu B’Shvat?

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Tu b’Shvat is an ancient celebration of the new year for trees. It takes place in the midst of winter in the United States, as we anticipate the coming of Spring and the first blossoms in the Land of Israel. Passover celebrates the Story of Exodus, rebirth, and marks the beginning of Spring.

Celebrating Passover with a Seder is a time-honored tradition.  However, a custom currently enjoying a revival is the creation and celebration of a Tu B’Shvat Seder. This ritual was developed in the 16th century by the Kabbalists (Jewish Mystics) in the town of Safed in Northern Israel. As with the Pesach Seder, it is highlighted by the drinking of four cups of wine, with a difference: each cup represents a different season. The first cup is traditionally white wine representing Winter, the second white with a few drops of red for Spring, the third a mix red and white for Summer, and the fourth mostly red for the Fall. It is also customary to eat four groups of fruit at various points during the Seder, each group is connected with a different realm or rung of existence — physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual.

Unlike the Pesach Haggadah, the liturgy for Tu Bishvat is less developed and codified, hence there is greater space for the creative organization of this festive celebration.

Here is a link to the Jewish environmental organization Hazon, which includes a variety of Tu b’Shvat resources and many texts and teachings on Judaism and the earth.

Chag Sameach!

 

Celebrate the Festival of Tu b’Shvat with Seven Species of the Land of Israel!

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Fig & Olive Tapenade
Fig & Olive Tapenade

Yemenite Charoset
Yeminite charoset
Tu b’Shvat is an ancient celebration of the new year for trees. It also celebrates the bounty from the Promised Land and of the earth as a whole.

In Deuteronomy (8:8 – 10), the Torah teaches us that the Promised Land is filled with “wheat and barley, vines, figs, and pomegranates, a land of olives and honey…a land where you may eat food without stint, and where you will lack for nothing…when you have eaten your fill, give thanks to the Lord your God for the good land which He has given you.”

The most popular way of celebrating Tu b’Shvat is to eat produce connected with the Land of Israel.

In these two Breaking Matzo recipes, we celebrate four of the seven species outlined in Deuteronomy. Our Tapenade highlights figs and olives. Our Yemenite Charoset highlights pomegranates and dates.

We hope you enjoy these delicious and healthy fruit recipes and celebrate the festival of trees!

Lighten Your Weekly Menu with Our New Plant-Based Recipes

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Let’s eat healthy!

I wanted to help you make eating healthy easier and more accessible.

We’ve developed 30 plant-based menu items for Breaking Matzo. Why for Breaking Matzo you ask? What is the connection to Jewish home holidays? Simple! I entertain a lot of people for Hanukkah, Succot, Shabbat and Passover as well as many other holidays. Many of my guests have dietary restrictions and gluten-free, vegan suits their preferences perfectly. I hope you can Incorporate some of these dishes into your holiday or everyday entertaining. These menu items can either supplement what you are already serving or comprise the entire menu..

We’ve developed a full week full of recipes. Breakfast, lunch, snack, dinner, and dessert. We have recipes that are raw and can be made or assembled in minutes. There are also more hearty and flavorful dishes that are are gluten-free and vegan. These dishes are all designed to allow easy entertaining.

Highlights include:

Breakfast

Avocado Toast with Pomegranate Seeds

Avocado Toast

 

Lunch

Fattoush Salad

Fattoush Salad

Spaghetti Squash with Basil and Kale Pesto

Spaghetti Squash Pasta

 

Snack

Fig and Olive Tapenade with Homemade Crackers

Fig & Olive Tapenade

 

Dinner
Quinoa & Vegetable Stuffed Acorn Squash

Quinoa & Vegetable Stuffed Acorn Squash

Garam Masala Roasted Cauliflower with Raisin Chutney

Roasted Cauliflower

 

Dessert

Hilltop Orchards Mini Apple Trifles

Mini Apple Trifles

Caramelized Grapefruit Halves

Light the Lights! An Interfaith Celebration

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“Kids….go get your Hanukkah presents… under the Christmas Tree!”

These words are spoken each year on the first night of Hanukkah. Light the lights! Our Christmas tree lights reflect brightly on the Hanukkah presents wrapped tightly under the tree, as the menorah candles burn low, shining brightly in our kitchen window. The holiday is more about being present than having presents (after all we have the 25th of December to thank for that).  We celebrate together exchanging presents and playing dreidel with chocolate gelt and we rejoice with singing “Oh Hanukkah, oh Hanukkah come light the menorah” and “Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel” as my kids roll their eyes and try desperately to silence me before I change the lyrics! Since my kids are little bit older now we choose to give them one present the first night (instead of 8). Usually it is an experience such as a concert or sporting event or gift cards to eat out with friends, perhaps a night of fun in Boston or NYC including dinner and shopping (for Christmas of course). It is a perfect time for us to be “present” as a family and enjoy some time together celebrating the magic of the holiday season.

I was raised Jewish. As a kid, I celebrated Hanukkah with my family; my parents and two sisters. 8 nights and 8 lights we spent each night picking out our candles, singing our prayers while lighting the menorah, eating latkes with red apple sauce and opening one small present each night. A typical week (not a no school holiday) we attended school, ballet class and theatre rehearsal but always came home to celebrate each special night. I loved spending this time with my family, and year to year we celebrated the five of us, keeping our traditions alive and enjoying the holiday time together. When Christmas rolled around, we spent the holiday skiing up north and eating Chinese food -I always wondered what it would be like to celebrate both holidays?

Years later I met my husband. He was raised Catholic and 100% Sicilian. He brought traditions of his past and family heritage and together while we dated for over 7 years we celebrated both the Jewish and Christian holidays together. He came to my family home to experience a Traditional Seder, at Passover sitting next to my grandparents (survivors of the holocaust) and I went to his house to experience a traditional Sicilian Easter meeting his relatives from Italy (the food, ah….the food)! Christmas with his family and friends and Hanukkah with mine. Teaching each other about the holidays and incorporating them into our lives.  It seemed every day was a Jewish or Christian holiday and there was always something to celebrate!

Elisabeth, her family, her sister and nieces picking out their tree!

Then we were married and had children. We discussed how we were going to raise our children and with our strong family bonds, our traditions (and our delicious food), both religions were to remain. We agreed it was up to us to teach our children the importance and meaning of all the holidays and the traditions we brought forth from our past. We discussed the similarities, and pointed out the differences… and realized, after all, many paths lead to the same god? Right? If you ask my children, I’m pretty sure they feel like the lucky ones. Celebrating both holidays with our families jewish or catholic, our backgrounds and religions have taught them how to respect others beliefs, despite their differences. It is the season of giving and that is what my husband and i have instilled in our children-making sure they know their holiday spirit can shine bright by sharing their joy, knowledge and traditions of all the holidays we celebrate, with others!